Tuesday 5 May 2015

The C-word and a weekend of loss

I was saddened this weekend to hear about yet another young woman who has been lost to cancer, Rebecca Ellison, wife of Premiership footballer, Rio Ferdinand. In the same weekend, we were treated to the incredibly powerful documentary, The C-Word, inspired by talented blogger Lisa Lynch. I toyed with the idea of not watching it, but felt that quite frankly, I owe it to Lisa, and others like her who have used their not inconsiderable talent (that means you, Kate Gross, with your breaktakingly beautiful book, Late Fragments) to educate the world about this hideous disease. What The C-Word managed to do was to bring to life the real horrors of breast cancer. I loved it for its real, unsanitised truthfulness that accurately and gut-wrenchingly represented my experience last year. The physical rigour of having to endure forty-eight hours of violent vomiting; the unrelenting, agonising migraines; the diarrhea; constipation; loss of appetite; burning piles; thrush; a throat so dry and painful it keeps you awake at night; bloating; weight gain; joint pain that makes you cry out; feet so sore you can't even put them on a cushion; elephant-like ankles and crushing exhaustion that makes even going to the bathroom an insurmountable challenge. Then there's the loss of identity, of your hair (and no, I didn't want to try a new hairstyle, I loved my hair and I would love it back), my scar-free body, my eyelashes, my confidence, my strength, my belief in the fairness of the world and my hopes of growing old with my husband. There's the gripping fear that even though this chapter is tentatively closed, with my recurrence odds, there's a one in three chance that like Rebecca, Lisa and Kate, I may not make it. (And the horrible realisation that when the odds for something are 'one in three', people are really excited for you as these are "really good odds").

I feel that we should all watch The C-Word and read Late Fragments. If you've not been through it, but know someone who has, then watch it and tell them that you feel for them and know that what they went through is not easily forgotten. If you've never been through it, then watch it and be giddily grateful that it's them and not you. Either way, we owe it to these brilliant young women to share their legacy. Hopefully a legacy that will result in more women being aware that this is not a disease for old people, for smokers or for heavy drinkers. It's a disease that can affect any of us at any time, and only by being vigilant, can we prevent it claiming any more of us.

Amanda  



I also watched 'The C Word' but a few days after it was aired on tv. On my own.
The last thing Lisa Lynch had expected to put on her ‘things to do before you’re 30’ list was beating breast cancer, but them’s the breaks (her words). So with her life now on hold, and her mind close to capacity with unspoken fears, questions and emotions, she decided to start blogging about the frustrating, life-altering, sheer pain-in-the-arse inconvenience of getting breast cancer at 28.
It's an unflinchingly honest and darkly humorous account of Lisa’s battle with The Bullshit, as she came to call it. From the good days when she could almost pretend it wasn’t happening, to the bad days, when she couldn’t bear to wake up, Lisa’s story is emotional, heartbreaking and often hilarious. 
I pretty much cried all the way through it, on and off, when she was first diagnosed, when her parents were crying and at many other points during the showing of this brilliant portrayal of women like me. It was also very real life for me because she had the same breast involved as me and we both had the same operation (mastectomy & reconstruction).
I have secretly kind of hoped that my friends and family watched this and hopefully have a better understanding of what we actually go through. 
It was also strange watching this and feeling everything that Lisa felt because sometimes it still doesn't seem real and feels like it happened to someone else and not me. 
I was so impressed with 'The C Word' that i've told my husband that he has now got to watch it on his own too.

Debbie

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